Helping Kids Through A Divorce

As a single mom of three kids, I know money can be tight and I always Do It Yourself (DIY) before purchasing. So I added links to those projects if I could find them. You can also use these ideas for yourself ad remember if you can’t take care of yourself, you can’t take care of your children. A burnout exhausted mom/dad is no fun.

Aromatherapy is a great way to help relax. When my children would come home from the other parent they were wild. I had to let them sit in front of the television and watch movies until bedtime, just to get them to calm down. Now, I would have filled the entire house before they came home with lavender or vanilla. Bother of these scents are great for calming.

I purchased one of those hearts that when you snap a metal tab it would heat up and turn to liquid. To get it back to a liquid state and to reuse you would boil it. My children loved when I put an oil on their back and then rubbed it with this heated object. My heart kept disappearing and I would find it with one of the boys. They liked sleeping with it at night. I ended up buying reusable heat packs for each of the kids. Not sure if children in a warmer state would like one, but in cold northern Michigan, kids love them. Also, you can DIY and save money or purchase a heated rice bag that you throw in the microwave and warm up quickly. 

When I worked with autistic kids, I learned that kids don’t always know that they are in pain. When I suspected my client was in pain, I would write on a wipe board different body parts. One time I just threw I toe on the list. When my client picked that, which was first, I thought he was messing with me. When I said right or left toe, he told me. While in the shower I checked his toes, and sure enough his toe was red around the nail. I would be asking if my child was in any pain and provide something for that pain. There is the normal over the counter pain meds. (Can children have Tylenol anymore?) We can get a headache from the stress and so can they. The best natural pain medication I have ever taken was a pain patch with natural ingredients. It was an MLM and went out of business. (Bummer) Now I use Plexus Ease that is made from a snail in Australis. (See food allergies, do not use.) Plexus is not really an MLM company, but you can each year purchase a membership to get items cheaper and you get a website, so you can make money selling and then renew every year to keep selling and getting the product for free. Who going through a divorce don’t need extra income. Renee can answer all your questions.

Some children get hyper when a lot is going on and some get depressed and can’t get out of bed, just like depressed adults. Yerba Mate is a natural caffeine made by plants. It does take over an hour to work, but it does not give a jittery feeling and your kids will not be bouncing off the walls.

While leaving an abuser is stressful, I can imagine it is triple stressful for children. Pretty sure I had PTSD because I could not sleep at night and things just continued to go around and around in my head. I would read the bible and pass out sleeping for four hours then when I woke up events were already going through my head. I would read the bible and fall back to sleep for another four hours. This is how I got eight hours of sleep. Now doctors are administering melatonin to children to help them sleep. If I had only known.

Weighted Blankets help autistic children and scientist are saying it makes a person feel more loved. The even pressure is said to imitate "deep pressure touch stimulation." This deep pressure touch has a calming, soothing effect on people's moods. These blankets are also being used for anxiety and insomnia and abuse survivors. They are quite expensive, but you can make your own. by checking out this DIY video using fleece. 

There are apps that can help a child learn how to control their anger or just breath to relax when frustrated. Download the app on a cell phone or iPad. Sesame Street has an app so even young kids can do it. There are apps where kids can make their own glitter or ambient sound that makes them relax. There is a Yoga app and for boys, there are video games on Escape. Worried about your child self-harming? Yep, they have an app for that too.

To learn more about divorce and getting a divorce got to Strategize Divorce Coaching.

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